endnote n.76: the dictionary-memorizing kid
and when he’d committed to memory entire dictionaries and vocab-check software and syntax manuals and then had gotten some chance to recite some small part of what he’d pounded into his RAM for a proudly nonchalant mother or even a by-this-time-as-far-as-he-was-concerned-pretty-much-out-there father, at these times of public performance and pleasure—the Weston MA School District in the early B.S. 1990s had had interschool range-of-reading-and-recall spelling-beeish competitions called ‘Battle of the Books,’ which these were for Hal pretty much of a public turkey-shoot and approval-fest—when he’d extracted what was desired from memory and faultlessly pronounced it before certain persons, he’d felt almost that same pale sweet aura that an LSD afterglow conferred, some milky corona, like almost a halo of approved grace, made all the milkier by the faultless nonchalance of a Moms who made it clear that his value was not contingent on winning first or even second prize, ever.
Context
The psychogenesis of the lexical prodigy, from the endnote on Hal's childhood damage-assessments: dictionaries, vocab-check software, and syntax manuals pounded into RAM not out of love of words but as an approval-machine aimed at the Moms, faultless recital conferring "almost a halo of approved grace." Rote lexical mastery as performance for two hands' applause — the exact diagnosis Orin will repeat about seventeen-year-old Hal at p. 1040 (below).