IJ study archive

the Removal: out of the cage since he was ten

quote

Substances hadn’t even occurred to him. I.e. the Desire and Compulsion had been Removed.

Context

The central miracle of the whole theme, and the payoff of the hypocrite's mechanical practice. After five months of faithless knee-prayers, Gately notices on the 0430 train that the craving is simply gone — not resisted, not white-knuckled, but "Removed," the days going by without Substances even occurring to him. The freedom is dated precisely to a cage he's been in "since he was maybe ten," tying the Removal back to the childhood couch and his mother's Stolichnaya. And the theme's characteristic honesty holds: Gately's response is not gratitude but suspicion, because a Higher Power he never believed in has let him out of a cage he had "zero hope of ever being let out of," and the inexplicability of the thing that is working drives him to crack a tabletop with his head. Recovery arrives as an unearned, unintelligible reprieve.

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