The method: a fresh third party for each "one more last time"; the appropriation artist

texture · YDAU + prior, recalled within scene 004

• When: the pattern spans his using life up to the scene 004 afternoon; the appropriation-artist episode is UNDATED but "the last" such episode before this one
• What: His account of quitting-and-relapsing: each time he decides on "one more last time" he recruits an all-new third party — never a known dealer, since he's told every dealer he knows to cut him off — representing the purchase as casual or mostly for "friends," and afterward asks each new source too, "as a favor," never to get him any more, ever, and out of pride never asks again: so each debauch seals off one more future source. Then he vanishes into a drawn-blinds hole-up and never contacts that person at all. The immediately prior instance was a Marlborough-Street-gallery "appropriation artist" whom he let believe he was a former intravenous speed addict using marijuana to hold off the harder drug; he saw her ten days, took 50 grams and a feminist painting off her, and cut her off. His stated therapeutic theory for the present debauch is to build "a really bad set of debauched associations" — to "cure himself by excess." Underneath it he registers, obliquely, a self-image of desires "starved of expression and drying out and floating dryly away."