The professional conversationalist — "I’ll begin by asking if you…"
‘I’ll begin by asking if you know the meaning of implore, Hal.’ […] ‘Implore’s a regular verb, transitive: to call upon, or for, in supplication; to pray to, or for, earnestly; to beseech; to entreat. Weak synonym: urge. Strong synonym: beg. Etymology unmixed: from Latin implorare, im meaning in, plorare meaning in this context to cry aloud. O.E.D. Condensed Volume Six page 1387 column twelve and a little bit of thirteen.’ ‘Good lord she didn’t exaggerate did she?’
Context
April Fools' Day 2003: ten-year-old Hal, sent to a blank-doored office to meet a "professional conversationalist" who is transparently his father in a latex nose. Asked if he knows implore, Hal returns the full O.E.D. entry down to page and column — and the definition he's reciting means to cry aloud, to beg, which is precisely what neither of them can do to the other. Verbal performance offered where contact should be; the "she" who didn't exaggerate is Avril, the prodigy's trainer.